St. John Paul II Knew the Antidote to Lust - Here it is
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St. John Paul II wrote something amazing in his book, Love and Responsibility... "A person's rightful due is to be treated as an object of love, not as an object for use." Every lustful thought does the opposite. It reduces a person made in the image and likeness of God to a means to an end. Not a human being with a name, a story, a soul, a family. A thing. Something to be consumed and discarded. That is what lust does to its object and that is what it does to the man doing the lusting. It trains him to use rather than love. And a man who has been trained to use cannot easily switch to love when he gets home to his wife. Here is the redirect that actually works. The moment a lustful thought appears, pray for the person. Not a long prayer. Just a simple one. Lord, bless her and protect her [or him]. Lord, help me to find in You whatever it is I'm looking for in her [or him]. That single action does something powerful. It takes a person your brain was reducing to an object and restores their humanity in your mind. You cannot simultaneously use someone in your imagination and genuinely pray for their wellbeing. The two cannot occupy the same space. This is not a technique. It is a retraining of the mind toward love and away from use. From inwardly-focused to outwardly-focused. From taking to giving. Done consistently it rewires the reflex. The thought appears. The prayer follows. The reduction stops before it roots. "Love is patient, love is kind. It is not self-seeking." [1 Corinthians 13:4-5] Not self-seeking. That is the opposite of use. That is what recovery is helping you with. And for the betrayed wife reading this: your husband's lust used people including, in different ways, you. Not because you were not enough. Because he had been trained to use rather than love. Recovery is the slow retraining toward what Pope John Paul II described as your rightful due. To be treated as an object of love. Nothing less than that. 2 Practical Tips: To Battle Lust: Starting today, every time a lustful thought appears, pray one sentence for that person before you do anything else. Lord, bless her and remind her of her dignity. Do it every time without exception. Watch what happens over thirty days. To Help Your Wife Heal: Tell her you are actively working on custody of the eyes. Not as a rule to follow but as a gift to her. Every deliberate look away is a choice to give rather than take. Let her know that is what it means to you. "I want my eyes to be for you. Every time I look away from something I should not be looking at, I want you to know I am doing that for us. I am learning to give rather than take." Treat people as objects of love. Never as objects of use. That is the standard. Join Catholics Fight Porn here. Remember, "You can do all things through Christ who strengthens you!" [Philippians 4:13] —Steve Join a FINALLY FREE! GROUP here. 🎙Listen to the Podcast: Catholics Fight Porn here. Sign up for a Daily 'Boost' TEXT for Motivation here. Book a 20-minute Intro Discovery Call here. Book a 1:1 Session w/Steve here. Read past Newsletters at the BLOG. Donate to CFP to support this work here.
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